Morning comes too early and I pack the lunches and ready breakfast and then I slip out back with my coffee while forks clatter on plates to start the slow waking. It’s fifty-six degrees outside and fall hangs heavy from the trees, pressing down from above. I stand under a lidded sky when suddenly a single star. My head is full of a cold and of music from last night and I am thinking about friends who drink too much and the way my boy looked marching out on the football field with that snare hanging down in front of him.
And what do you do when someone who used to love you—whose children you’ve loved and held and prayed for—deliberately keeps a secret just to hurt you?
The beauty of the meadow dawns with all her yellow and purple ironweed and a flock of birds inks out the emerging light above.
Sometimes the season changes before I’m ready—the slow-turning earth won’t wait for me to catch up. And why am I so slow, anyway? Always holding on to the way things used to be.
I gather up a song in my head…try to cover it all with love—with grace. The cloak doesn’t fit so well this morning and I think of a poem—my migration poem and I wonder what it must feel like to shift with the seasons this way. And I wonder why I can't write poetry anymore.
I close my eyes and I can soar—catch an updraft and shed the weight of the dew. Why not let a poem remind me that I can fly? There is beauty in the hard wrestle—the twisty, turny knots of life.
I may limp for the rest of my days but I’m holding on for the blessing.
and have you seen
them move as one
across this brumal
the sun with their
hearts pulled by
some invisible string—
joining this great
dance that spinsthis world.
your lure. do not
spare my wandering
heart your beauty.
listen to it:
**The winner of Elaine Olsen's book, Beyond Cancer's Scars, is Genevieve Thul! You can read about her journey with cancer here. Congratulations, Genevieve, I know you will be blessed by Elaine's words. I'll be in touch.
How do you embrace the God-joy? Every Monday I’ll be sharing one of my Playdates with God. I would love to hear about yours. It can be anything: outside, quiet time. Maybe it’s solitary. Maybe it’s loud and crowded. Just find Him. Be with Him. Grab my button at the bottom of the page and join us:
The Playdates button:
Sharing with Laura Barkat today also: